Sometimes You Gots To Chill

I know it's been a few weeks but REALLY...I just had to CHILL! In my rageous age I'm learning not to sweat the small stuff and just do me. I'm enjoying me much more and remembering who I used to be, figuring out who I want (or am supposed) to be and paying attention to what God has planned for me.

So, I've taken my much needed blogging break; I'm back and much lighter (figuratively, not literally...I wish) I'll add. I'll share more in the coming days.

Until then...CHILL

Book Update

I have figured out my book!  Yes!  

Sidebar:  I met this guy online and after each point made he would put YES!  I of course never met him, very annoying and a little scary I might add.  BTTB (this texting has me all messed up)...Back to the book.

You will know more about it this week, which we know may mean next week for me.  I'm working on the book and book proposal now but in the meantime guess what?  I'm going to have another blog!  LOL  I can't keep up with the 2 I have now, but this one is a necessity for the book so If You Think You're Lonely Now: 

LOL...you can catch me at the other blog AND I do expect full participation!

Have a great weekend! Anything fun going on?

Product Review: Auriderm Illume Eye Cream

I've been on this quest to maintain my sexy.  Since turning 40, I don't want to let myself go and we all know how easy that is.  An extra helping of mashed potatoes, those cokes, daily happy hours, I'll exercise tomorrow (which rarely comes); oh, yes it is very easy to lose your sexy at 40 and older.   Ladies, I know we are tired of it all and want to do what we want to do, but we will just feel worse when it "all" creeps up on us then we bemoan when did xxx happen?  So, instead of those extra cokes, apple martinis, frappucinos and other yummy but not great for you items let's spend the money on making ourselves look and feel better.  Trust me, in the end this is much better for your self-esteem and health.

Stepping off of my soapbox.

Remember, when I went to the dermatologist for my hyperpigmentation?  I also had circles under my eyes.  Pretty (ugly) I know.  I purchased a product for that also.  I would like to report it is working wonders!  I no longer look like the other person won the fight or like a panda cub (cute as they may be).  

Auriderm Illume Eye Creme - $50

Use twice daily (with your regular eye cream) and you are good to go.  You should start seeing results in 4-6 weeks (I did).  

Auriderm is now part of my beauty arsenal!  Great product!  

Does anyone else use anything for dark circles?  

Doggie Update

I think I found a puppy!  I wasn't necessarily looking for a puppy as I have been told, I was looking for dogs under age 2 and hypoallergenic.  Today I stopped off at the Washington Animal Rescue League just to see what was what.  I saw all the hypoallergenic dogs but there was one more dog they wanted to show me that was only 5 months old, not hypoallergenic but so sweet.  I said sure why not.  Aww man!  I think I may love her.  She is a Chihuahua and Miniature Pincher mix.  She's playful, lovable and so cute!  Not hypoallergenic or potty trained (lol) but fairly obedient.  

I visited with her for about an hour; I'm going to take my friend and her daughter to see her later today.  I did place an application, so I may be a first time Mommy soon.  I'll be prepared for Baby I next year yet!  :-)  

How the Dermatologist Jacked Me Up

Do I look happy?  NOOOOOO!!!!!  

I haven't been taking the best care of myself, I'll admit it.  I've been crazy stressed, don't sleep like I should and haven't been eating right.  So, when a few months ago when I started getting dark spots on my face I was concerned.  I changed my facial products.  No avail.  I tried to sleep more.  No luck.  I am trying to drink more water.  Nope.  So, I purchased OTC Esoterica fade cream.  That worked a tiny bit but I was still concerned because it wasn't really working.  Dark marks on the face...not cute.  I had to wear concealer/foundation moisturizer and I don't like concealer and foundation.  

I finally broke down and contacted my dermatologist but it was 45 days to see her.  Not good enough.  I looked for reviews for other top dermatologists.  I made an appointment with one since the wait was only a week.  Immediately (when I walked through the door) I knew I wouldn't like this dermatologist but my face needed help.  She gave me a more potent lightening cream, Obagi.  I used this stuff for 2 weeks and my face got worse.  As a matter of fact the chemicals burned my face.  

Uh, oh.  Not happy.

I contacted my regular dermatologist and begged for an emergency appointment.  I went the next day and she looked at my face and said "What happened to you?"  I told her the story and she said the treatment was too strong for my skin since I have sensitive skin.  She also informed me that the burn went down a layer or two on my face and the only way to get the discoloration out now is a combination of natural lightening products and laser.  

OUCH!  

So, let's talk how much money I'm out now.  I paid $115 to the first doctor for treatment and products that made me worse.  My regular doctor (who I trust) says I need new products and laser.  Products and office visit $365.  Laser which I haven't had yet $350.  

Oh, and what did this all start from?  Hormones I'm told.  WHAT?????  

Is this what I have to continue looking forward to in my 40s?  HORMONES messing up my life, body and face?  I've been taking hormones for 5 years now and I'm just 40!  I wonder if I need a new prescription or if this is par for the course.  I'm not coming off of them because the doctor said I'm too young and they have their benefits of which I'm totally in support of.  

ARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!! 

I guess until this goes away it's concealer and foundation.  Any good recommendations out there?  

Oh, what did I learn from this?  Never trust my face to anyone else except Cultura.  Just like my dentist, they are both a little more expensive but oh so worth it!  

Youthful Looking Nails?

Is there a such thing as youthful looking nails?  Do men really pay attention to your nails?  Do I really feel better if my nails are done?  I used to think the answer was no until recently.  

I used to be very high maintenance but it was hard on my purse and on my nerves.  I made (and am still making) an effort to pare down my lifestyle which included getting rid of those acrylic nails.  I continued to keep my nails trim and clean but I gave up fingernail polish (the toes stayed done) because it never stayed on very long.  I did find a few that stayed on a few days but it became too much trouble, so I just didn't bother.  

One of the things I have promised myself (for my 40s and beyond) is that I am always going to look good just for me which includes my nails.  As a result, a few months ago I started polishing my fingernails again, however I was using a neutral polish.  I loved the way it looked but I didn't think anyway else noticed.  I was wrong.  

The past few weeks several men (even twenty-somethings) have said how nice my hands and nails look.  One man said what color is that, peach?  WOW!  I always do my nails now.  The neutral dries fast and gives a quick gloss.  I can do my nails in 15 minutes (or less) and I'm  good to go. I've branched out to lighter neutrals and may even try fashion colors again...as long as they come from OPI or Essie.  Love them!

Do you do/get your nails done regularly?  What is your favorite polish brand?

Spoke To Soon...

ARRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!  It won't let me be!  

Can I get a break?  I've missed a great weekend.  

I want my money back for the crab legs that made me sick, I'm requesting that tomorrow!

Feeling Better

It's 3:46 am and I'm FINALLY starting to feel better.   My stomach cramps, body aches, headache, fever, hot/cold flashes and nausea have started to subside.  I think today I will actually be able to take a shower and enter the land of the living.  I won't be 100% but better.  

Whew, that was terrible!  

BTW...the culprit was crab legs purchased and cooked at Safeway.  

Food Poisoning...HELP

Anyone ever had food poisoning?  I have a small (what is small) case of it.  

What can I do other than lay in a little ball on the floor of my bathroom?  

HELLLLLPPPPPPP!!!!!!!

Washing That Gray Right Outta My Hair!

Remember the commercial jingle from the '70s?  

"I'm gonna wash that gray right outta my hair.  I'm gonna wash that gray right outta my hair."

whistling now....

Well, that is exactly what I did today!  No, my brows aren't gray, but I need to look like a natural redhead don't I? 

And how was your day?  

The Color Purple

Last week one of my friends (a former client) called me and said she was taking a couple of her friends out for dinner and to see The Color Purple...to my surprise I was invited also.  Wow. How nice. I took my mother to see The Color Purple on Broadway when it first came out and thoroughly enjoyed it, so I definitely was excited to see it again.

Five of us met at the Kennedy Center for dinner first at the Roof Terrace Restaurant.  Can you say YUMMY?  OMG. If you have a chance to catch a show at the Kennedy Center please, Please, PLEASE eat dinner at the Roof Terrace; you won't regret it, I promise.

Next, the show.  Fabulous.  It was a little different from when on Broadway, but IMHO it was better.  Fantasia did her thing as Celie! 

"I curse you.  Until you do right by me everything you think about is gonna crumble!" (maybe I should have said this to Mr. Wonderful last week...tee hee hee)

If you haven't seen the Color Purple yet...GO!  As you can tell, we had a great night.  I must spend more time with my friends.  More girl's nights I feel are coming up this year before baby girl comes home AND you can quote me on that one!

Has anyone else seen The Color Purple? 

7 is my Favorite Number

It is my day of birth.  

My lucky number.

AND

The number of days until my birthday!

Woot!  

What shall I do for my birthday?  

HMMMM.  

Any suggestions out there?  

If You Didn't Know...

...in the midst of my trying to figure out what to do with my life, I'm actually a part-time interior decorator.  I really enjoy it and am actually very good at it.  Modest I know.  My clients, family and friends don't know why I fight it...I'm not sure, I guess that's the MBA in me. However, I think I am going to start small projects again.  I really miss it. The joy of spending thousands of dollars of someone else's money.  Have you ever bought a $10,000 dining room table (not including chairs)?  I have!  I felt like a baller even though it wasn't mine, I was representing the rich yet not so famous.  

And going to design shows???  Talk about furniture porn...it was the next best thing to an orgasm I've ever had!  No, really! For a designer (lover of furniture or furniture snob) I kid you not!  So, why am I revisiting this you ask?  One of my blog buddies, Tam, is in the process of redoing her home and is looking at chairs this month so I'm adding my .02!  So, Tam, I hope some of these pictures are helpful.  I'll keep you guys posted on my new projects and heaven forbid I start a third blog!  I just couldn't take another!  LOL

What small steps are you making to move toward your dreams this year?  Happy Friday and have a Safe and Happy Holiday!  

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

I went from this at 4:30.

To this at 7:00.

(plus shrimp, plantains, rice and beans and mango mousse)

Today was a great day!  I hope you enjoyed your Cinco De Mayo!

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

Remember that little lent thing of working out 'er day?  Yea, didn't happen.  

Remember my goal of being in better shape in year 40?  Yea, hasn't happened...yet.

I went on a date last weekend with an ex and he sent me pictures from the date.  YIKES.  He looked good (ok, he needs to loose weight but he's a comedian and he's fine with it, it's part of his routine now...lol), meanwhile I looked like I was very Hip. LITERALLY.  I never knew my hips were (or could get) so wide!  Yet, my date loved them.  He said I had woman curves now!  ROTFL  I was horrified.  I have a few too many curves, in a few too many places.  He even said, "hey did your boobs get bigger."  Yea, that's what happens with weight, it just goes everywhere!  ARGHH  I was pretty okay with my girl curves as he called them.  I don't know if I'll have them back again because once you hit that pause button you fight and fight and DARN IT fight for every freakin' ounce but this is ridiculous.  I'm not going out like a punk.  

Those pictures were scary!  I'm back in the gym with classes because obviously I need someone yelling at me.  Do you think I can tighten some of this up by my birthday in a month?  Let's hope so because I'm going shopping for my 40th and I would like to buy my normal size!  

So, the moral to the story is...take a picture...that will smack a bit of reality into your life!  

Any words of encouragement are welcomed!

Career Crisis

Can I be honest?  I'm not happy go lucky these days.  Oh, can you tell?  Do you want to know why?  I'm having a career crisis!  I'm 39.11 (lol) and I don't know what the heck I want to do when I grow up!  I have way too much education (and student loans) to be like this.  You would think that after that MBA I would have figured it out.  NOPE!  Once I got it (1999) and became a high-paid corporate consultant I was like what the hell!?  Is this what I signed up for?  Hated it. (huge sighhhh)   I moved on after a few years and have been moving on ever since trying to find my niche.  

What do I really want to do?  Don't know.  Some days I think I do.  Some days I don't know.  I'm a crazy ass Gemini who loves the 60s.  I've been like this for a good decade (Yes, I know.  Pretty sad.  I had you fooled didn't I?) so it isn't anything new, but since I'm turning 40 I just can't go on doing something I hate.  I'm miserable.  What do I do?  Not to mention the economy sucks...I'm not even going to get started on that one or else you might see me jump right from this page.  lol 

Much like the cartoon I used to think I could have it all and be anything I wanted, but now I've realized that sure I can have it all just not at the same time.  Sure, I can be anything I want...just as long as I choose right the first time or can afford to pay for past lessons learned.  

Ok, no bitching tomorrow...only after you solve my career crisis.  What the hell do I do when I grow up?????

In The Dating Trenches

Wednesday I had two dates, one at 5:00 and one at 8:30.  Both were interesting and since we get so much enjoyment out of my dating life, I thought I would share (although I have missed telling you about a few).

So, I met this guy who worked in DC but lived in MD and caught the train into the city for work.   His suggestion for our first date was that I drive 40 minutes to where he lived so he could take me to Olive Garden.  Hmmmm.  No thanks. I’m not a chain restaurant type of a woman and certainly not traveling 40 minutes for a first date.  I believe that was a date I went to when I was like 25 not 39.  As one of my male friends said: FLAG.  As he tried to convince me to drive 40 minutes for Olive Garden, I suggested we meet the next day in the city.

The next day it was raining, so I drove past his job and picked him up so we could find a restaurant around his job.  He suggested the Channel Inn (a 2-3? star hotel).  I said “REALLY?  Channel Inn?  No, Way!  Old Guys (acting like playas, with their mistresses) go there.”  He said "only on Thursdays."  I told him emphatically NO.  He said "fine we can go anyplace you want to go."   Great.  Let’s go to the lobby bar in the Mandarin (a 5 star hotel). I pull up and you can only valet and he says, “Oh, you are rolling like that?” I just look at him and get out of the car.  I have a friend who is a sales manager there so I call him to come save me. He comes and has a drink with us then covers the first round.  It takes my dates 10 minutes to ask me if I wanted another drink (remember he didn’t pay for the first round) then 10 more minutes to see if I wanted an appetizer.  At 7:00 I say, I have to go pick up my friend.  As we are leaving we both have to go to the restroom but remember my car is in valet. He hasn’t yet said "let me get your car for you."  Well, I do what any self-respecting woman would do and give him my valet ticket and say "please get my car while I am in the restroom."  He looks at me like I am crazy but gets my car.  That’s what he gets for trying to take me to Olive Garden and Channel Inn… As Steve Harvey says in his new book Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man, "Men respect standards: get some and men will rise to the occasion if they are interested in you." 

Moving on to the next date. It was a quick meet and greet because I couldn’t take much more after the other guy so it was Starbucks.  The guy was very attractive and had the body of a 22 year old and unfortunately a brain to match.  He was pretty immature and I didn’t get the idea he was that bright.  I left the old soul for the I don’t want to grow up kid.  ARGHHHH.  Don’t get me wrong, they were both “nice” guys but alas not for me.

Next!  

Have a great weekend!

Is Sustainable Youth My Fountain of Youth?

Apologies for no post yesterday.  I'm on day 2 of a migraine, it took me all day to write this.  See how much I heart thee; even through pain I write for you.  Can I get a cookie now?  :-)

There is a new, organic, anti-aging company in town -- Sustainable Youth where they believe beauty can and should be achieved from the inside out.  Steps are taken both orally and topically to renew and restore your skin’s elasticity and firmness.  Their magic ingredient seems to be Alasta™, a propriety blend containing Aloeride®, which research has shown can be a potent immune-stimulatory ingredient (derived from Aloe Vera) that stimulates macrophage activation. (Macrophage function is important for wound healing and collagen production.)

Since I’m trying to stay off of the cutting board as long as possible and am shifting to a more natural lifestyle using only fillers when really needed (both literally and figuratively), I thought I should give the products a try.  Yes, it helped they asked me also…semantics.  So, over the next 4 weeks I am going to be a real live guinea pig (typical for me anyway).  I don’t have wrinkles yet (thanks Mom), but I am getting laugh lines that I would like to see a little less of and one way or another(yes, I did say that), I will.  Following is my regimen for the next four weeks:

• Elastifirm Supplement Capsules (twice a day)
• Revitalizing Serum (morning and evening)
• Elasticity Cream (morning and evening)

Wish me luck!  Maybe I’ll end up looking like I’m 21 again.  Ok, maybe not 21, but let’s see what changes the next 4 weeks Sustainable Youth brings forth.

I'm Back!

Yes, it’s been a week, but I’m back.  Vacation is over.  Back to reality.  I had a fabulous time.  I tried to log on to get my online fix (and catch you guys up) until I found out it was $15.95 a day in addition to my $25 breakfast, $25 lunch, $40 dinner, $10 per drink charge then suddenly my free vacation was not so free (note to self: it's never a free lunch).   I had to pass on something so the urge to emerge quickly diverged.

 
I expected to go on vacation and lie on the beach the entire time and chill but to the contrary. My friend had friends who had friends (did you get that) in St. Thomas so they took us out every night except the first night.  Restaurants, bars, beaches, home cooked dinners; we were treated royally or was that like royalty.  Blast.  I did manage to get a little burn beach time.  I was in the sun a little too long and got a little too crispy!  I’m very sure the sun was not great for my rageous skin even with all this melanin.  After this trip, I’ve decided this is my last tanning session or not wearing SPF 900.  When you get darker the lines are way more noticeable (at least to me they are).  I could also be more sensitive because I’m getting ready to turn 40; nevertheless I’m done cooking.  I know, save the comments about cancer and all of that stuff, I rarely did it and I know the ramifications…blah, blah.  I’m now going through corrective action…serum, extra moisturizing, exfoliating and apologizing like crazy (to my face of course).  I appreciate you, I appreciate you, I appreciate you…forgive me, for I have sinned.  

Back to regularly scheduled blogging.  I have some pretty good posts coming up.

Rocking 40 List Update

As I approach the end of month 3 (or 2 for my Chinese New Year) of my Rocking 40 List I have accomplished a few things, but I also realize I have so far to go.  However, it has not all been for not because through this process I am learning a lot about myself like...I don’t do well being put into a box.  Many of those items I first had a monthly or weekly target but I soon realized that was too stressful for something that was supposed to be fun and I don't need any additional stress.  Some would call these goals, but I just don’t do well with closed ended goals like these, I’m more of an open-ended person.  I see the bigger picture and in Tamiville it always has more than one answer.  I could have never been an engineer or mathematician because I always thought there was more than one solution to the problem.  I'm just creative like that.  Although I don’t do well with "confinement" I realize I do need more structure in Tamiville particularly since my daughter is coming home (relatively) soon, this helps me to tackle them aggressively and give myself a break when I don’t accomplish them.  For instance: I gave up the no TV rule. My stress level required the mindless boob tube, but I am cognizant of it now and I am weaning myself off of it.  

Following are my other updates:

• Getting rid of unwanted clutter (paper) and items in my home.  This is a continuous battle.  I’m just tired of stuff! I want to lead a simple life full of only things I love, need and have a sentimental value.  How do we accumulate so many things?  I can't take it!!!!!
• Have scheduled and had monthly game parties at my house since February, they are a blast!  Number 3 is April 3.  
• Decided on the book I am going to write and have started working on the proposal and outline.  If anyone knows anything about writing a nonfiction book please send me an email.  I'm new to this....HELLLPPPP!
• Working out is up and down.  I don’t do well in times of stress, counter intuitive I know.
• Working on an adventure with my best friend…stay tuned! 
• Have not read one book! I have decided to make it a cumulative total (for the next 18 months) instead.

So…there is the update.  How are you coming with your list?