My Nephew Wants an Older Woman

I just got off of the phone with my nephew who is a very handsome and a young 20.  Every single time he calls me one of the first things he says is "Auntie do you have a woman for me?" I laugh hysterically and continue to tell him he can't even buy alcohol legally so NOOOO.  He says he doesn't need to, he can do other things.  I laugh even harder and tell him he isn't messing with an 18 year old he would get his feelings hurt.  ;-)  

"Oh, c'mon Auntie, I'm tired of these young girls and their games and dumb conversations.  Plus, I know all of your friends are fine and not silly. I want a WOMAN!  So c'mon Auntie...hook me up!"  

Tami is now ROTFL.

I finally told him sure, I would try to find him a woman.  So...here is my attempt...tee hee.  Does anyone want a 20 year old Army boy oops MAN (as he calls it)?  LOL  I'm just being a good Auntie.  

The AARP Envelope

Today I was feeling pretty good about life until I opened up the mail and guess what I saw?  A welcome letter from AARP!  I'm pretty sure they were looking for my mother.  We do have the same last name and all since I'm still single.  She also has in the past used my address but for the life of me I wasn't sure why they had my name on HER AARP envelope.  Mom, if you are reading this, I'm forwarding your mail to you tomorrow.  This one I don't want to keep in my house.  Kisses!

A Reality Check

This weekend I went to my mother’s 60th birthday party.  I had a great time with my mother and family. All weekend we laughed, joked and did as family does…talked about each other. It is always funny (and a tad bit scary) to me that I can now “hang” with my mother and her friends because I’m of age. I still remember the days when they couldn’t have certain conversations because kids (me) were in the room. Now, they have all kinds of conversations, but the ones I enjoy most (not really) are the ones where they talk about all of their ailments.

Friday night about 9 of us were playing Tripoly (a very fun card game) and the conversation went something like this:

My #3 and #4 bone in my spine bother me

It’s #2 and #3 in mine

Oh, it’s #4 and #5 in mine

My finger jumps for no reason
I just think my back went out
I can’t see the print…can I borrow someone’s glasses
I’m hot, open up the sliding doors
Whew…I thought it was just me…I’m hot too

At this point I started looking at all of them and I just busted out laughing. They said you just wait. Aging is no fun! And we can’t wait for you to start having your own private summers because you will see. I laughed again and said yeah, yeah...I’m fighting all of that stuff and as far as menopause…Did you forget, I’ve been in menopause since I was 35 thanks to the fertility doctor that jacked me up?

Ah…premature menopause…lovely! But thanks the drugs I take EVERYDAY I don’t have the hot flashes and some of the other side effects they try to scare you about and trust me I was petrified about them! But I’m all good…mostly, extra dry skin and slow a@# metabolism aside. 

So, while my mother and her friends have their private summers…I pop a pill. Most of you reading this haven’t started the big M yet so I’ll be schooling you on it but my first word of wisdom is: You are what you think you are!  I don't really know what the big hoopla is all about.  Life is no different for me except I take a pill and I don't buy tampons monthly...now that is great!  Life is Good!