Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Don't Ask My Age?

This weekend I went to a birthday gathering for a friend that turned 40 a few weeks ago. It was a gathering of women where we had a great time reminiscing, relating and some refusing to admit they were or soon to be 40.  I don’t get it.  40 is a monumental time.   A rite of passage; I see it as my personal time to leave the BS behind, my private New Year or New Life.  They should all be celebrating and dancing in the street as far as I am concerned.  Instead, I have seen them lie about their age or use the line “you never ask a woman how old she is.”  Not that it matters, but these were beautiful women who looked like they were 30 and they were sad about turning 40.  Beauty definitely cannot bring confidence.

At various points in the night they mentioned how 40 was the new 30 or 20, which I believe we do have it going on these days (40 just isn’t what it used to be), but I was still bothered by the denial and sadness they had at entering this milestone.  I mean, as much as I loved my youth…I would not live it again if you paid me.  Ok, well, maybe if you paid me a lot of money, I could do the confusion, anxiety, low self-esteem and caring more about what everyone else thinks than about me again. However, I would love to have my metabolism back again, that perfect complexion, beautiful (minus the grays) hair, the ability to stay out late without taking a nap first or to have more than a drink or two and not need a day to recover…now that would be awesome!  

I think Oprah sums it up best on turning 40:

“Before I turned 40, I used to always worry about what everybody thought about everything…but, at 40, you see with crystal clarity.”

I don’t know about the other women at the party but I’m not denying or lying about being 40.  Go ahead ask me, ask me how old I am, I bet I'll tell you (some other stuff I might not)!   I’m as happy as pigs in mud (that’s for you Tracy, lol).  It is said at 40 you get clear and I must admit that each day I’m clearer as to my path and my life.  40 is great for me!

How is 40 for you?  How do your friends feel about turning 40?   If you aren’t 40 yet how do you feel about the milestone?

1 comment:

  1. I love being 40 for the personal freedom I've gained, but I don't like the physical changes happening in my body. Also, reaching 40 gave me 20 years to look back on and view the error of my ways - choices that have profoundly affected the outcome of my life. There is some regret I admit, but everything has been for a purpose.

    Turning 40 has put me in touch with my own mortality in a way that I have not felt prior. I am sure having a young daughter has a lot to do with that. Also, where babies are concerned my age has been a barrier. If I could, I would get pregnant again.

    40 has brought me to a place that I don't have to accept BS in my life and that has been greatly empowering :)